Writing at the intersection of motherhood, feminism and my Latinidad

27 May 2008

More on feminism, motherhood, & the Walkers

Baby Love came out over a year ago, so why all the interest in Rebecca Walker and the radical things she says in the book? I don't have a clue.

Feminist Law Professors points us to a few new media pieces:

I read Baby Love, got to ask Rebecca a few questions over the phone, and saw her in person where others got to question her. While I do feel that the harm her mother, acclaimed feminist Alice, is totally true, I am starting to feel that her continuing airing of their relationship in the media is uncalled for. As I said in my last post on them, I know how ones relationship with ones parent can dissolve into nothing.

I also know second wave feminist moms who did suffer when they had their child. Claims of traitor or some such nonsense. So it's not too far fetched to listen to Rebecca's claims. Now a huge confession...I've never read any of Alice's work. So I have no idea if Rebecca's situating her mom's work is true or not. But considering how high profile all of this is, I'm gonna say that Rebecca's on the money. Seriously...correct me if she's wrong!

When I was pregnant I didn't want to know if I was having a girl or a boy because for one, I wanted to be surprised. And two, I did not want to buried under pink or blue crap! I opted for greens and yellows and some blues. I even bought a few boy jackets for my unborn because well, sometimes boys clothes are just built for play. I knew my kid, girl or boy, would play.

I do have a Barbie ban in place, but my daughter has dolls and plenty of stuffed animals. She plays house with them, but in her play, her dollie's daddy is in the picture. I assume that he's an involved imaginary daddy considering that I've walked into her pre-school to see two of her friends of the boy gender playing house - together - one of whom was pregnant.

On the other hand, my daughter's room is pink. It's rose pink, but it is pink. I let her pick out the color. She loves wearing dresses & some days the only way I can get her into pants is to remind her that we do not get to climb trees in our dresses...unless there are pants underneath. She will not be that 8-year-old you see in her micro-mini climbing at the playground. Um, no. Not even at 4. That's why skorts were invented. All hail skorts!

Bottom line...if Alice Walker wrote the feminist mom rules, I've most likely failed half of them. But she didn't. No one did. Each of us write the rules within the parameter of our own feminism. No, no...not choice feminist motherhood, but if our feminism is rooted in solid theory, then our mothering will be as well.

Yes, my daughter is a "burden" when I'd really like to hit T's and grab a martini with some girlfriends and when I'd like to hit a networking reception that is central to who I am trying to be, but am I gonna take it out on her? Um, no...I chose to have her. I knew that I'd have to stay home with well, mother her! She is not my sister...I have two of them already. She is my daughter. A young woman-child whom I am trying to mold into a loving human being. Lucky for me, she came that way, I just need to keep her loving life & others and not allowing the ugliness of life to overcome her glow.

When I was in a situation with my late-mother, my godmother stepped in. Anyone got Gloria's phone number?

Technorati tags: feminism, motherhood, Alice Walker, Rebecca Walker

2 comments:

I feel sorry for her because I know she's been hurting for a long time, but I also feel that this public humiliation of her mother is her way of 1) getting her attentions 2) getting some kind of a reaction from her. I too wish she would stop airing her problems and instead seek a more positive way of getting her feelings out, but I don't think this is healthy for her.

Totally agree -

To be honest, I haven't read the book, but it sure has been hashed enough in th media to feel like I have!

I am not sure if I agree with the "airing it all" era that we live in. If Alice Walker wasn't a famous writer, would this book have been written? Or, would she have been on Jerry Springer? Not judging - just asking.

Also, as the parent of one of the boys who play house in pre-school. I can absolutely assure that there are mommies and daddies in all play - even with the stuffed animals... (BTW, you will never guess who the mom is in all the play - and the name of the baby...._ :-)