Viva la Feminista

Blogger asks me for a title and I have no clue.  All I know is that I have a new job so I have more money, my daughter is now in college so I have more time for myself, and I am so lost. Now that I don't have to drop her off at school and take her to soccer (which I desperately miss) I am taking the train into work. I am trying to find my rhythm.  If I do the full commute on my own, I walk up the street to the bus stop, take that east for a bit, jump on the Red line to Jackson where I transfer to the Blue line and get off at my campus stop. I walk up the steep walkway to the street and head into the office. During this hour and a half journey I listen to a meditation app - which, to be honest may not be helping. Each time it asks me to clear my mind, a zillion rush in. Usually the ones that I have been keeping at bay. The ones that taunt me. When the meditation app asks me to locate where my body is holding the stress it reminds me that I have begun to clench my teeth s...

I'll teach my daughter / To bang on anything that makes a beat / She ' ll shake-a-boom, she ' ll quake a room / She ' ll ... She ' ll do all of this . And she ' ll do none of this. And it's funny how we hide behind these daughters , Hide ahead of our own herstories. Scared of ourselves. Today is my mom's 15th birthday since her death. It is the last of the 15-year milestones (15 years since her death, Ella's 15th birthday, 15th Christmas, 15th of my birthday). The woman who instilled in me how special I was, how important I am to the world, and who held me to high standards, should be indulging in a tiny slice of turtle cheesecake for her day. Instead a bit of her ashes sit in a tiny urn on my altar.  She hovers over my life as a sage and cautionary tale.  Dear reader, you may be shocked at how I can hold anger in my heart over her death. Well, I do. I am mostly angry at all the wonderful things she has missed out on, including res...

Yup! It's a hopeful New Year's blog post! All full of spunk and aspirations to write more in the new year. It is also a post to acknowledge that #365FeministSelfie is still a thing and at the start of our sixth year. SIX YEARS!  Part of me can't believe that this is still going strong. Part of me sees all the posts and knows why it is still going strong. I've said it before and I need to say it again, but what started as a silly project ended up creating a conversation and community around feminism and how the media depicts feminists. Yes, we still have articles popping up saying that selfies are dumb, narcissistic, and all that jazz, but selfies are just a medium. Not all selfies are dumb, but not all of them are feminist either. Some are cries for help, but not in the manner that set off this project. I have seen people post selfies asking for support in many different ways for many different scenarios. I am not good at asking for help, especially from those close...

So hey...As anyone looking at this blog can tell I haven't made time for this space lately. The honest truth is that life is fairly good. But that good is exhausting. At this time last year a grant I helped write was funded and I've spent most of my energy working on getting that project off the ground. It is going so well, but I come home pretty well spent. And when I do have energy to do stuff I am organizing with Reclaim Chicago trying to make Chicago the best it can be. Then there's the not so little data point that my daughter is now in high school. She's the best teen you could ask for, but it's still an adjustment. I am also going to start experimenting with Medium. I wrote a post a few weeks ago, so please go check it out! I'm working on another post for Monday. But I do want to write more here because I'm behind on my book reviews again. My TBR&R pile is out of control. So watch this space for more! Don't forget to like my Facebook p...

Today is " A Day Without a Woman " and I'm headed to work. It is not because I cannot afford to not go to work as I can. But as a salaried worker who gets paid vacation and sick days, if I don't show up at work, I still get paid. Not sure how that fits into the rhetoric about striking. I am also at a very critical start-up moment for my new job. I am trying very hard to not bring home work or check email over weekends, so being an efficient as I can be during work hours is very important to me. And this being efficient during work means I've been so tired when I get home that I've been too tired to write much here. I fully support everyone who does strike on Wednesday and support those who have no choice is showing up at work. If anything comes from this day is a larger examination of who provides the volunteer hours to make our schools function, who organizes the medical appointments in the family, and how many vocations are dominated by women that ...

I was invited to participate in Evanston's Writer's Resist event on January 15th and this is an edited version of what I read. I'm still new to the live lit scene, but will occasionally post what I read. Sometimes things are best left at the event. Margaret Atwood’s The Handmaid’s Tale has been shorthand for the collective backlash to women’s progress, especially in regards to reproductive autonomy for quite some time. Safe to say most know the plot without having had read the book. A tale of a post-democratic former-USA taken over by an ultra conservative Christian theocracy where fertile white women are forced to reproduce for the “worthy” ruling class. A few weeks ago I was struck by the faint memory that the book does not conclude in escape or the reestablishment of democracy, rather it ends with an academic talk pondering the veracity of the story we had just consumed. This fact hit me in the gut as I have been considering how we will document the resistance...

During this difficult time I am finding myself avoiding working after I get home. I've made 4 pussy hats in about three weeks. I binge watched "One Day at a Time" - which was amazing, by the way. Go watch it. I have also tried to spend as much time as I can with friends. Basically I have practiced a lot of self care. I hope you have too. Part of my self care routine for this year is to try to draw you a little something to color each month. I combined my new obsession of fancy handwriting and long time love of inspiring quotes for bad ass people. This quote is from Chicana feminist theorist Gloria Anzaldúa . Go to Dropbox to download a PDF of the image.

Don't get too excited now...I am certainly not going to attempt to blog every day this year. But I felt the need to get blogging right away today. So who knows!  2017 eh? We survived the great 2016 purge and we should be grateful for that. A lot of has been written about our public grieving over lost idols and pop culture icons. What I will say is this...1) I truly feel like we are finally at some tipping point of pop culture where we have a critical mass of such idols that when they start to die, it feels like a reaping. We're still just about 100 years since the mass consumption of radio, television, and films. Add to that the explosion of pop culture from those who create art (Bowie) to those who simply do stupid shit, and we have a whole lot more people to watch out for on our dead pools. 2) Many of us learn stuff from our idols. Some good, some bad. But behind the tears are some really strong reasons for mourning. I am still a bit ashamed to say I got up early to wa...

I asked friends on Facebook what word they want to carry into 2017 and this is what I made from their suggestions. Not everyone's word made it here, but I did my best. And yes, I made you a black & white version to color for yourself. Now let's go kick 2017's ass before it can do the same to us. via GIPHY via GIPHY via GIPHY

wow...Almost four months of not posting here. That may be a record, but I'm so busy that I don't have time to actually figure it out. So what's been up with this lack of writing? Well writing other places. First of all I've been writing over at Bitch Media, mostly, about the election.  As They Head to the Olympics, Women's Soccer is Fighting to Win Equal Pay   Who Are the Women Behind the Trump and Clinton Campaigns?   Don't Think the Supreme Court Matters? Think Again.   Donald Trump Supporters Are Nostalgic for a "Simpler Time"—That Never Existed   Trump’s Racism Could Backfire As He Inspires Latinas to Go Vote Against Him And as you can see, doing a lot of writing about Trump. Hopefully you are following me on Twitter or like this blog at Facebook because that is where I do promote my writing. I also wrote two pieces about Brock Turner at Mom.me. I also spent the summer wrapping up my last job working with women in STEM student...

WHEW! It's been quite a few weeks for me. Let this gif speak for me: An essay on #365FeministSelfie and domestic violence was published at the Daily Dot.   The Love Her, Love Her Not reading at Women and Children First was a smashing success. At least from my POV as we had a full room, great conversation and I looked out to many friendly faces.  Before our great reading, Joanne Bamberger (our fearless leader & editor!) & I made an appearance on WGN-TV Midday News . Not only was I proud to represent the book on my hometown TV station, but I geeked out at all the Bozo memorabilia that was in the studio. AND..AND....Steve Sanders was super into the book. A few weeks earlier, I was also part of a Love Her, Love Her Not reading in Bethesda that was covered by CSPAN Book TV . A totally different crowd, but still a great conversation.  Truthout commissioned an analysis of the sexism that has been a major part of the 2016 campaign on the GOP side. ...

This fall Ella moved from playing recreational soccer to a club team. This means she's playing with and against girls who are serious about their soccer. We still have a continuum of seriousness as well as skill. But overall it has been a good fall season. At 12, Ella has moved from being a big fish in a small pond to being in a much tougher pond. And for the most part she has handled it beautifully. Ella is still learning to be a better soccer player, and she is doing it by learning from her fellow players. That point is really a highlight to this new league. Playing in a competitive league could have lead us to a group of girls and their families where players are cut throat. All the girls are between 11-13, prime middle school catty time, right? But the players on our team seem intent on winning, so that means making sure all the players are ready to win too. Today was their last match of the fall season, which they won. It was a tough one too, but that makes winning it ...

This weekend has been the National Women's Studies Association conference in Milwaukee. I presented a paper on the use of femininity to attract girls and young women to STEM (science, technology, engineering and mathematics). It's a paper that I have been mulling for a few years and the conference's theme of "precarity" gave me the push I needed to finally work on it. Luckily I also had a summer intern who not only read some of the journal articles I cite, but we were able to sit down and discuss them. My office is pretty small, so when I can have a coworker that I can bounce ideas, discuss papers and even flesh out paper directions with I really enjoy it. The paper is not complete, but the feedback I received today will propel me to finish it and try to get it published. This is hands down my favorite conference to attend. It's a feminist nerd fest. And this weekend has not disappointed. Some highlights: Sara Ahmed's keynote was riveting. She start...

This is how you know that I was not a good riot grrrl. I worshiped the shit out of Alanis Morissette. I've heard all the critiques of Alanis. That she was too pop to be real riot grrrl, but to one 20-year-old young woman trying to find her place in the world, Alanis was the perfect amount of anger at the right time. Every.single. song. on that album spoke to me. And the fact that there was the hidden track? OMG! Mind blown at the audacity. "All I Really Want" is still one of the best openings to an album. "What I wouldn't give to meet a kindred," spoke truth to the fact I was lacking in close friends at the time. I had friends, but somehow I had failed to make really close friends. I missed a lot during college. I also have a concert tee that says "Intellectual Intercourse." "You Outta Know" is my go-to karaoke song because even 20 years later you can get a room full of women to scream out "YOU OUTTA KNOW!!" at the top of...

It is finally real. The anthology, Love Her, Love Her Not: The Hillary Paradox , is officially published! When Joanne Bamberger invited me to submit an essay to the anthology I was still smarting from leaving a doctoral program. But I dove in and edited an essay that I had written for The Broad Side . While I resemble many other writers in dreading the revision process, it was quite healing to have something to focus my brain on. And the theme of the anthology certainly summarizes my feelings about Hillary. She is complicated and tests my progressive feminist ethics. But I know there won't ever be a perfect candidate. I try to weight her flaws with her strengths. I hope that you will pick up this anthology and read all of our hemming and hawing over Hillary. I am proud to share space with these fabulous thinkers: KJ Dell'Antonia, The New York Times Amy Ferris, Marrying George Clooney Nancy Giles, CBS Sunday Morning Froma Harrop, Creators Syndicate Sally Kohn, CNN ...

I made it into the NYTimes, folks! I wrote an op-ed about how the perfect gift for Mother's Day is a selfie. It stems from the fact that I do not have a lot of photos with my mom. Please check it out and share widely. I also wrote a Mother's Day piece for LatinaMom.me about learning to love Mother's Day again : It has been 12 years since I've had a mom. It has also been 12 years since I became a mom. The cognitive dissonance can be overwhelming and becomes unbearable as we build up to Mother's Day. My mom died at the start of my third trimester, as I was pregnant with her much-requested first grandchild. And it sucks more and more every Mother's Day. But every year, I also grow to love Mother's Day in a new way. Soon after my mom's death, I let my subscription to Mother Jones lapse because their renewal notices had marketing copy on the envelopes that read: "Your Mother Wants to Hear from You!" In my head was a litany of curse ...

  One secret about Space Camp is that it is not just about space, but about team work. This lesson was drilled into us on the second day when we went out to a wooded area and told to find a way to escape an exploding Earth to Venus. We had to build a bridge and since we were in space, we had to stay tethered to each other, always maintain contact with the bricks AND could not speak. As you can see in the photo above, we did pretty darn well. We fell for the oldest trick in the book - we trusted our trainers! They watched us like hawks waiting for us to let go of each other or of a brick and OOPS! It floated out into space. For me it was a lot of fun because I like these type of challenges.    We obtained our second mission and I got to be the pilot! Lea Thompson, eat your heart out. The previous night we learned that the pilot is actually the co-pilot. The shuttle commander is the actual pilot. And I'm totally ok with that! Phillip, the commander, and I focused mos...

There is the proof! I made it to Space Camp and it was awesome folks. I could write for the rest of my life and not fully describe how awesome it was to be there. As I have said before, I was inspired to be an astronaut after the Challenger explosion so the shuttle means a lot to me. Thus being this close to Pathfinder , even if it was never built for space, was freaking awesome. Advance apologies for over using "awesome" in this post. Pathfinder does include two solid rocket boosters, genuine space shuttle main engine nozzles and a genuine external tank. So there's that. I seriously was so nervous for this trip that I had a nightmare the night before I left that I overslept and missed my 6 AM flight. Then I was worried that I booked a flight for the wrong weekend, because well, sometimes I am prone to writing things down wrong. I double checked times a zillion the dates when I booked the flight and every few days since then. I guess when you have been dreaming of s...

A quick update... 1) I am all set! And we're now just one month away from me paying for the most expensive vomit ever. YES!! 2) While I only raised less than half of what I wanted to pay for this birthday gift, I am closing down my GoFundMe campaign for two reasons. The first was the fact that they will allow campaigns to support the police officer who killed Michael Brown , but secondly they think raising money for abortions is bad. So ok, make a case that raising money for an officer before he's found guilty shouldn't be a big deal..Seriously, I'll give you that. And even PayPal and all the credit card companies are making money off this tragedy ( there's also a campaign to support Brown's family ). OK, ok...but what really got me is that they wrote in no abortions in the GoFundMe " What's not allowed " page. And if you know me, you know I raise money for abortions a lot, so seriously, I can't give that platform anymore of my money......

 I booked my weekend! Enough friends have chipped in for my 40th birthday wish , that I just had to jump at registering for the 4-day experience in October. I'm so excited! I'm still far away from my goal, but today I'm taking my saving jar to the bank to see how much I have there. Doesn't sound like a lot, but my husband is a 5-star coin saver. Thanks to everyone who has chipped in for this trip 30 years in the making!