Writing at the intersection of motherhood, feminism and my Latinidad

03 January 2012

Giving up Annie

Sunday I thought this post was going to be entitled, "Giving up on Annie." Instead we gave her up.

Monday we packed up the car and drove two hours to meet up with the couple who helped connect us with our dachshund, Annie. Tony handed Annie back to this loving couple. We were surrendering her to their care.

New Year's Day brought us nothing but heartache. We woke up late and as usual, Tony took the girls, Annie & Piper, outside to do their doggie business. But this time Annie could not scamper up the stairs. Tony carried her inside, put her down on the floor and it was evident that something was wrong.

We eventually realized that something was very wrong and took her to the animal ER room. Which, by the way, is one of the most depressing places I have ever been in. I felt like half of us were crying.

The vet took a few minutes to look over Annie and determined that yes, it looks like she had a ruptured disc.

Now, we knew going into all of this, when we adopted Annie, that doxies were prone to back problems, but we had fooled ourselves into thinking that if we exercised Annie enough, kept her weight down and carried her down the stairs, that she'd be ok until she was a little old lady doxie. But we were so wrong. Everyone always commented on how well Annie was physically. Perfect weight, sleek, the picture perfect doxie. It makes no sense what happened.

After hearing all the details of the surgery option, the cart option and the putting her to sleep option, we took her home with enough medication to keep her comfortable until we could figure out what to do.

A very long story short and without the gory details, we ended up contacting Lois, who is our contact with the doxie rescue we got Annie and Piper from. I also knew it was in our contract to notify her if we couldn't take care of either of them anymore. And well, we had come to the conclusion that we couldn't take care of Annie anymore.

This picture is of our girls together, one last time. Annie still has a lot of spunk left in her and returning her to the doxie rescue was the best decision for all of us. Lois cares for many doxies who are in need of extra care, special care and round the clock care. If anyone can help Annie heal, it would be Lois.

We are all heartbroken in la Casa de Roni. Piper too.

I was feeling (and honestly still am) totally guilty about us realizing that we just could not take care of Annie anymore when one of my besties, Amy, texted me and said, "Our dogs are a part of our family, but we have to make the best decision for our human family." And sadly that's what it came down to.

I know some people will think I am awful for letting Annie go, but I know we gave her the best chance for recovery. Sometimes loving is about letting go and we had to let her go.

If you want to do anything, send the DRNA some money because they do this sort of work all the time. Otherwise just send the kid some hugs and Annie strength to get through what could be months of recovery.

5 comments:

I'm so glad my words could give you some comfort. This entire episode has made my decision as to how I'm spending izzy and I's spring break.....if you'll have us...we would love a Chicago vacation. This time with us renting a car so we can explore while you guys are busy.

The terrible thing would have been putting her down because you couldn't deal with her. A part of caring for another being is knowing your limitations. You made a hard decision to do what was best for everyone involved, and while it's difficult for you to let her go, you are giving her the best chance to have the best quality of life. Hang in there, chica. I'm thinking about you all!

I'm so sorry you had to part with your dog. :( But you did the right thing. Not only did you do what was best for your human family, but you also did what was best for your dog, and that is not always easy.

Oh Roni, I'm so sorry. I think you made the right decision, though. It was tough, but you did it from a place of love and you're giving Annie the best chance possible at recovery. There's no need for guilt there.